Seriously.
I've gotten to the point where I don't feel like focusing on anything that isn't directly related to what I plan on doing with my life. I know it's not good to feel that way yet because the reality is that I DO have these GEs I have to take care of, and the better I do in those classes, the more I'll options I'll have open to me once I graduate. But sometimes I get so absorbed in the art projects that I'm doing that I lose sight of that. I get all these ideas for projects I want to do and I wish so badly that I just had the time--that I could just forget about everything else and focus solely on this thing that I love.
I'm reminded of this (from PostSecret):
Every day I am more and more convinced that I chose the right major. There are plenty of other
subjects that interest me: music, psychology, English (writing)... but I can't imagine myself in any of those fields as an actual career. Art is therapy for me, it allows me to express myself, it is like a universal language that has provided as legitimate an account of history as any book, as clear a view of the human condition as any psychologist. I love art, I define myself by it, it is my religion, my solace, my voice.
And compared to that kind of passion, everything else seems secondary. I'm sure my parents would tell me I've got my priorities all mixed up if I told them that I felt it more important to spend my time on a painting I've had in my head for months than to study for that midterm. And I'm not so foolish as to let myself give into that urge, but it still almost feels wrong to me. Like since I am fortunate enough to know already with such confidence what I want to do, that I ought to drop everything else and work toward that.
Of course, GEs have value and there's a reason we're forced to take them. And since now that I'm in college and I have the liberty to choose which classes I want to take, I've only rarely taken a GE that I actually found to be deadly boring. Additionally, not all GEs are completely unrelated to my major either. I had a literature class last year that I absolutely loved, and from which I gained knowledge about important pieces of writing which served later as themes for some of my own works of art.
For example, one poem that made a particular impression on me was Ezra Pound's two line poem entitled "In A Station Of The Metro" which reads: "The apparitions of these faces in the crowd; Petals on a wet, black bough." Though short, this poem manages to convey so simply and succinctly the transitory nature of human life; how each individual, though unique and beautiful when inspected closely, is little more than a temporary flash of an existence, and how faces in a crowd seem to blur together and lose identity like pink, flesh colored petals on the black bough of an industrial society.
Even though the setting for this picture is not in a metro station, I did have Pound's poem in mind when I shot this double exposure in Italy this last summer. By capturing the movement of people on the Rialto, I tried to express the same sense of life as being transient.
I suppose my fierce attitude toward GEs was a bit exaggerated... the opportunity to take non-art classes and expand my general knowledge is actually the only reason I'm glad I'm at a liberal arts college instead of a specialized art trade school. But I still sometimes feel exasperated by them, and I do wish I had more time to work on art projects that may not be related to schoolwork. My final project for my photo class is a hand bound book containing at least 12 photographs. The task was a daunting one at first, but I made a mock-up yesterday and it was so exciting to have my pictures there in my hands as tangible objects rather than as images on a screen, and I've already fallen in love with the book making process. When I have more time, I'd like to make a portfolio book containing all of my favorite photographs that I've taken. It's a fun, hands-on process, and it would be an impressive addition to a portfolio. I also want to get back to painting those three mannequins that I bought last summer, I have several ideas for photoshoots I want to do (including an underwater shoot that I wanted to do for the book project but I didn't have the time), and I've been inspired by the lectures on surrealism in my art history class to bring to life the man with the cardboard wings, my favorite dream character.
On another subject, I've been suffering from cabin fever again lately. Not so much because of the house I live in (which I really can't complain about, it's in a prime location and my roommates are great) but because of this town in general. San Luis Obispo isn't completely lacking in personality or culture, but we're not exactly a metropolis either. The best word to describe SLO would be "pleasant." It's pretty and the weather is always comfortable, there's enough going on to keep you from going insane, and the people are nice, albeit sheltered. But I feel like exciting things never happen here. San Francisco, LA, and Santa Barbara are all only a few hours away, but this place where I live doesn't inspire me. I know a few adults in the area who have never left this place; they were born here, they went to school here, then college, and when they graduated, they got jobs here. Blech! I can't imagine doing that. My biggest fear is that because I'm going to Cal Poly and all of my connections are local, I won't be able to find a job outside of this county. I can stand being here for the rest of the time I'm at Poly, but if I don't find a way to move after that I think I'm going to lose my mind. When I talked to my adviser last, she told me that in order to graduate in 4 years, I would need to do a full-time internship this summer, so I'm hoping that, since it is over the summer and I won't have school, I can take that opportunity to go elsewhere (I think I'll shoot for San Francisco) so that I can have a chance to network in a place I might consider living some day.
Now for a complete change in topic. I've noticed an interesting trend trend lately that's already been widely talked about and ridiculed: hipster culture. I suppose this isn't exactly a new phenomenon, but it's started to really take hold in my town. A new coffee shop just opened up called the Kreuzberg, and it is the epitome of hipster... which, to clarify, is NOT entirely a bad thing. The spacious room is lined with shelves bursting with books, large paintings by local artists, and portraits of philosophers, and the interior is furnished with couches, communal tables, a piano, a functional typewriter and index cards on which customers can write comments and then pin up to the wall, and table lamps that hang upside down from the ceiling. My first reaction to the place was excitement; Linnaea's (another local coffee shop that's been around for decades and has always been kind of an "indie kid" hotspot) has been a sort of home away from home for me for years, and I was enthusiastic about the opening of a new place that catered to the same subculture. But unlike Linnaea's, which has a certain authenticity and a history behind it, Kreuzberg tries too hard. It's sort of like the difference between wearing a Velvet Underground tour shirt that used to be your dad's that he actually got at a concert that he attended, as opposed to buying a "vintage" Velvet Underground shirt from Urban Outfitters that's been acid washed to make it look like it's old. Kreuzberg and Urban Outfitters, to me, are like a microcosm of the larger trend. The intellectual is in. Or rather, the faux intellectual--the kid who wears thick rimmed glasses, baggy 80s style sweaters, and carries around The Complete Works of Friedrich Nietzsche but never actually reads it. Kids all of a sudden are striving to look like Yale undergraduates, when really all they know is the celebrities of art culture: Andy Warhol (yes I realize I have Warhol's Marilyns as my background image), Ansel Adams, Jack Kerouac.
I must admit I speak out of both sides of my mouth when I rip on hipsters; on the surface, I love the style. The interests, clothing styles, music, and other media associated with hipster culture are all very much my taste, but what I object to is the attitude of superiority that seems to accompany it. I will always support interest in literature, underground music, philosophy, fuel-free methods of transportation, vegetarianism, and outdated technology (such as the movement away from digital photography and back to film and lomography), but it seems that these interests are fueled primarily by the fact that these things are popular. And since these interests are more trends than real interests, those who take part in the trends tend to know less about trends they're promoting than they ought to given that they're allegedly wearing that band shirt because they love the band, or carrying around that book because they're genuinely interested in the subject. Case in point: Urban Outfitters started selling Diana and Holga cameras relatively recently (Dianas being a throwback to the 60s when the original cheap plastic Diana cameras first became a hit, and Holgas being a Chinese-made plastic camera that brought about a similar movement in the 80s). But many young people who tote around these cameras treat them more as jewelry and don't actually know the first thing about manual film photography.
I'm not trying to make this a blanket statement. Surely there are plenty of "hipsters" who actually do know their stuff--kudos to them. And my analysis of hipster culture here isn't exactly a complaint either... even though I do wish that these trends that I endorse were accompanied with greater general knowledge of the subject on the part of those who subscribe, I am relieved that at last progressiveness and democratic ideals are in. Honestly I don't even care whether kids these days are taking an interest in fuel efficiency and "greenness" because their friends are or because they care about the issue, I'm just glad pop culture is pushing them in the right direction for social change. Hopefully by the time the trends change (as they inevitably do), these political ideas will have made enough of an impression to last in people's minds.
On a semi-related note, atheism is apparently also on the rise. I find it hard to believe that something as fundamental as spirituality could be the result of a trend, so I find this news quite encouraging. Articles have been popping up all over the web about how there are more atheist clubs on college campuses than ever, and that the number of those who report a lack of faith is steadily rising. Some have hypothesized that this increase is due in large part to our ongoing economic crisis, but the fact of the matter is that whereas before people tended to be less open about their spirituality if they didn't have religious feelings, now people seem to be a lot more confident in breaking away from the norm and asserting their beliefs. I've never had a problem with religiousness, as long as it remains a personal thing, but I think everyone's noticed how much of a joke our "separation between church and state" is, and although I don't mind people using religion as a means of self-improvement and guidance, I very strongly oppose the interference of religious beliefs in politics because more often than not, it winds up passing laws that inhibit the rights of others.
Oof. That's enough of that.
As far as personal news goes, I'm pretty much ready for this quarter to end... although the class I was most looking forward to next quarter is already full with 7 people on the wait list, and I still have 6 days before I can register. "Sex, Death & Numan Nature" sounded really interesting, but alas. There is a Religion and Violence class that is at the same time and has plenty of seats still, so I might take that instead. Either way, next quarter looks like it's going to be really fun. In addition to whatever I decide to take to fill that spot, I'll also be taking editorial photography, the history of photography, and a philosophical classics course from my dad. That should be interesting... I've been debating for a while now whether to take his class or not and I finally decided there was really no reason why I shouldn't. I'm actually kind of excited to see him in a classroom atmosphere. He's always been engaging in conversation even at home when he's talking about a subject he's passionate about. And it's a large class with 120-something students in it, so it will be less personal. Other than that, things have been good. It's getting to that point in the quarter when everything starts being due, so I'm pretty busy, but I'm feeling good.
This is the longest post ever and I'm sick of writing it, so I'm done. Later!
I suppose my fierce attitude toward GEs was a bit exaggerated... the opportunity to take non-art classes and expand my general knowledge is actually the only reason I'm glad I'm at a liberal arts college instead of a specialized art trade school. But I still sometimes feel exasperated by them, and I do wish I had more time to work on art projects that may not be related to schoolwork. My final project for my photo class is a hand bound book containing at least 12 photographs. The task was a daunting one at first, but I made a mock-up yesterday and it was so exciting to have my pictures there in my hands as tangible objects rather than as images on a screen, and I've already fallen in love with the book making process. When I have more time, I'd like to make a portfolio book containing all of my favorite photographs that I've taken. It's a fun, hands-on process, and it would be an impressive addition to a portfolio. I also want to get back to painting those three mannequins that I bought last summer, I have several ideas for photoshoots I want to do (including an underwater shoot that I wanted to do for the book project but I didn't have the time), and I've been inspired by the lectures on surrealism in my art history class to bring to life the man with the cardboard wings, my favorite dream character.
On another subject, I've been suffering from cabin fever again lately. Not so much because of the house I live in (which I really can't complain about, it's in a prime location and my roommates are great) but because of this town in general. San Luis Obispo isn't completely lacking in personality or culture, but we're not exactly a metropolis either. The best word to describe SLO would be "pleasant." It's pretty and the weather is always comfortable, there's enough going on to keep you from going insane, and the people are nice, albeit sheltered. But I feel like exciting things never happen here. San Francisco, LA, and Santa Barbara are all only a few hours away, but this place where I live doesn't inspire me. I know a few adults in the area who have never left this place; they were born here, they went to school here, then college, and when they graduated, they got jobs here. Blech! I can't imagine doing that. My biggest fear is that because I'm going to Cal Poly and all of my connections are local, I won't be able to find a job outside of this county. I can stand being here for the rest of the time I'm at Poly, but if I don't find a way to move after that I think I'm going to lose my mind. When I talked to my adviser last, she told me that in order to graduate in 4 years, I would need to do a full-time internship this summer, so I'm hoping that, since it is over the summer and I won't have school, I can take that opportunity to go elsewhere (I think I'll shoot for San Francisco) so that I can have a chance to network in a place I might consider living some day.
Now for a complete change in topic. I've noticed an interesting trend trend lately that's already been widely talked about and ridiculed: hipster culture. I suppose this isn't exactly a new phenomenon, but it's started to really take hold in my town. A new coffee shop just opened up called the Kreuzberg, and it is the epitome of hipster... which, to clarify, is NOT entirely a bad thing. The spacious room is lined with shelves bursting with books, large paintings by local artists, and portraits of philosophers, and the interior is furnished with couches, communal tables, a piano, a functional typewriter and index cards on which customers can write comments and then pin up to the wall, and table lamps that hang upside down from the ceiling. My first reaction to the place was excitement; Linnaea's (another local coffee shop that's been around for decades and has always been kind of an "indie kid" hotspot) has been a sort of home away from home for me for years, and I was enthusiastic about the opening of a new place that catered to the same subculture. But unlike Linnaea's, which has a certain authenticity and a history behind it, Kreuzberg tries too hard. It's sort of like the difference between wearing a Velvet Underground tour shirt that used to be your dad's that he actually got at a concert that he attended, as opposed to buying a "vintage" Velvet Underground shirt from Urban Outfitters that's been acid washed to make it look like it's old. Kreuzberg and Urban Outfitters, to me, are like a microcosm of the larger trend. The intellectual is in. Or rather, the faux intellectual--the kid who wears thick rimmed glasses, baggy 80s style sweaters, and carries around The Complete Works of Friedrich Nietzsche but never actually reads it. Kids all of a sudden are striving to look like Yale undergraduates, when really all they know is the celebrities of art culture: Andy Warhol (yes I realize I have Warhol's Marilyns as my background image), Ansel Adams, Jack Kerouac.
I must admit I speak out of both sides of my mouth when I rip on hipsters; on the surface, I love the style. The interests, clothing styles, music, and other media associated with hipster culture are all very much my taste, but what I object to is the attitude of superiority that seems to accompany it. I will always support interest in literature, underground music, philosophy, fuel-free methods of transportation, vegetarianism, and outdated technology (such as the movement away from digital photography and back to film and lomography), but it seems that these interests are fueled primarily by the fact that these things are popular. And since these interests are more trends than real interests, those who take part in the trends tend to know less about trends they're promoting than they ought to given that they're allegedly wearing that band shirt because they love the band, or carrying around that book because they're genuinely interested in the subject. Case in point: Urban Outfitters started selling Diana and Holga cameras relatively recently (Dianas being a throwback to the 60s when the original cheap plastic Diana cameras first became a hit, and Holgas being a Chinese-made plastic camera that brought about a similar movement in the 80s). But many young people who tote around these cameras treat them more as jewelry and don't actually know the first thing about manual film photography.
I'm not trying to make this a blanket statement. Surely there are plenty of "hipsters" who actually do know their stuff--kudos to them. And my analysis of hipster culture here isn't exactly a complaint either... even though I do wish that these trends that I endorse were accompanied with greater general knowledge of the subject on the part of those who subscribe, I am relieved that at last progressiveness and democratic ideals are in. Honestly I don't even care whether kids these days are taking an interest in fuel efficiency and "greenness" because their friends are or because they care about the issue, I'm just glad pop culture is pushing them in the right direction for social change. Hopefully by the time the trends change (as they inevitably do), these political ideas will have made enough of an impression to last in people's minds.
On a semi-related note, atheism is apparently also on the rise. I find it hard to believe that something as fundamental as spirituality could be the result of a trend, so I find this news quite encouraging. Articles have been popping up all over the web about how there are more atheist clubs on college campuses than ever, and that the number of those who report a lack of faith is steadily rising. Some have hypothesized that this increase is due in large part to our ongoing economic crisis, but the fact of the matter is that whereas before people tended to be less open about their spirituality if they didn't have religious feelings, now people seem to be a lot more confident in breaking away from the norm and asserting their beliefs. I've never had a problem with religiousness, as long as it remains a personal thing, but I think everyone's noticed how much of a joke our "separation between church and state" is, and although I don't mind people using religion as a means of self-improvement and guidance, I very strongly oppose the interference of religious beliefs in politics because more often than not, it winds up passing laws that inhibit the rights of others.
Oof. That's enough of that.
As far as personal news goes, I'm pretty much ready for this quarter to end... although the class I was most looking forward to next quarter is already full with 7 people on the wait list, and I still have 6 days before I can register. "Sex, Death & Numan Nature" sounded really interesting, but alas. There is a Religion and Violence class that is at the same time and has plenty of seats still, so I might take that instead. Either way, next quarter looks like it's going to be really fun. In addition to whatever I decide to take to fill that spot, I'll also be taking editorial photography, the history of photography, and a philosophical classics course from my dad. That should be interesting... I've been debating for a while now whether to take his class or not and I finally decided there was really no reason why I shouldn't. I'm actually kind of excited to see him in a classroom atmosphere. He's always been engaging in conversation even at home when he's talking about a subject he's passionate about. And it's a large class with 120-something students in it, so it will be less personal. Other than that, things have been good. It's getting to that point in the quarter when everything starts being due, so I'm pretty busy, but I'm feeling good.
This is the longest post ever and I'm sick of writing it, so I'm done. Later!
